tears that ain't comin'
by Hidden Fear
Summary: a story about marie and logan going through life. features the songs Iris, Better Days, the Boy in the Bubble and more. probably doesn't really need to be rated M...
1. tears that ain't comin'

Disclaimer: i own the clothes on my back, my boyfriend, and my chemistry book, that's it. i saw X-men 1 when i was a little kid… 10 maybe. scared me so bad… for weeks all i could think about was Wolverine's claws shooting out of his hands and the pain he must have felt. that's really the only thing i remember from the movie. i haven't seen the second or the third one, but i REALLY want to. i'm going to do that soon. i saw a few episodes of the little X-men thing that cartoon network showed a couple years ago. Rogue was my favorite character in that series, i watched it just cause i liked her, she was everything i wanted to be and not afraid to be herself (the rest of it was cool… the mutants and all, but i really could relate to Rogue… all the other teens were very childish). i just… i've always felt like her, exactly. and there's that tiny bit of Wolverine in me to. hard to say weather i dread it or love it, but it's there. (i love it, but it can be hard to deal with at times)  
Um… all that to say, i hope i've done a decent job representing the characters. i would like to think thati have, as i instantly connected with both Rogue and Wolverine… but, eh, what can i say? i haven't really seen the movies. i'm drawing mostly from personal experience here.  
Oh. also… the song scattered throughout (hopefully you'll be able to tell what's the song and what's not?) is called Iris and it's by the Goo Goo Dolls. (odd name if you ask me, but this song really helped me through some tough times) (listen to it at www . purevolume . com)  
That's all ah got. Enjoy.  
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And ah'd give up forever to touch you  
'Cause ah know that you feel me somehow  
You're the closest to heaven that ah'll ever be  
And ah don't want to go home right now

She sat at the window, watching the rain. It was Friday evening and everyone was out having fun. She hated it, but when she was alone her thoughts often strayed to the wanderer. Her wanderer.

He was gone, again. Again, again, it repeated slowly in her head… again, again, again…

Tonight she broke down. It wasn't the first time and it wouldn't be that last. She stared out the window as the tears poured down her face. It wasn't just one thing that set her off, it never was. Lately she'd just gone through too many things and finally lost the will to fight. She found that she broke down about once a week when he was gone. Her other friends did what they could, but often they weren't even aware that she was in pain. When he was there, she never broke down. He wouldn't let her. Anytime she was sad, he was there. But when he was gone, things were different.  
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He stood outside the school. Now that he was here, somehow it was different. Same old place he figured, but perhaps he'd changed.

Logan hadn't been feeling too well lately. He didn't regret leaving, he needed a break, but something just wasn't right. Before he'd always felt completely satisfied off on his own. Not this time. This time the dreams of a girl he'd left behind hadn't gone away, nor showed any signs of doing so. Everything reminded him of her, and the constant reminder was more than he could take. _Yeah, he missed her. So what? _He tried to reason with himself, but the fact was that he couldn't remember missing anyone before, let alone imagine missing anyone this much.

So he decided to go back. He'd thought about going back; he'd even started a couple of times…  
But this time he'd gotten there. And he'd decided that if she… if she… (he could never bring himself to finish that thought) well, he'd decided he just might stay this time.  
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And all ah can taste is this moment  
And all ah can breathe is your life  
'Cause sooner or later it's over  
Ah just don't want to miss you tonight

She would have heard him come in had she not been sobbing. She'd been crying off and on for half and hour now, though if anyone had asked she would have denyed it.

The next thing she knew she was in his arms, and he making noises she knew to be comforting noises.  
_Him, it was him… was she dreaming?_ She pulled away, not quite sure what was happening.

When she pulled back he got a good look at her. She looked awful, as most people who have been sobbing look. Yet she was always still beautiful to. It was as if she could never be anything but beautiful in his eyes.

She tried to rub her eyes on her sleeve, she'd not bothered to do that before, but now was ashamed to be seen like this. It didn't work very well as she had already soaked her sleaves with tears. She made herself caml down and tried to act as if nothing was wrong, like she'd done ever since he'd left. "Hey, what's up?" she asked, in a voice as carefree as she could manage.

"Maybe you'd better tell me."

"I'm fine." She lied.

"Sure, and I'm your aunt."

"Very funny."

"Tell me what's wrong kid."

And ah don't want the world to see me  
'Cause ah don't think that they'd understand  
When everything's made to be broken  
Ah just want you to know who ah am

She was tired of crying, tired of life in general. Too tired to fight anymore. She looked into his eyes and gave up. She might have been able to pull it off with everyone else, but there was no fooling him. "How about ah save time bytelling you what's right?"

He grunted. "Whatever you want."

She paused for a moment, almost contemplating telling him what was wrong. _What are you thinking? He's the one who left, he's the one who hurt you._ "Why are you here?" _why was he here? Had he come back for her? _Her mind raced… she was so mad at him, and yet a small part of her was glad to see him.

"Why am I here?" he thought for a moment before answering. He wanted to tell her, but now probably wasn't the best time. Who knew what else was going on? He shrugged. "Don't know exactly… but right now I'm here to make you feel better."

And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming  
Or the moment of truth in your lies  
When everything feels like the movies  
Yeah you bleed just to know you're alive

_Doesn't really love me. Prolly never did. Just… came back for a change?_ She turned away. "I'm a little tired." She said lamely. "I'm going to go get some sleep." She quickly left the room as new tears started down her face.

And I don't want the world to see me  
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand  
When everything's made to be broken  
I just want you to know who I am

And I don't want the world to see me  
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand  
When everything's made to be broken  
I just want you to know who I am

And I don't want the world to see me  
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand  
When everything's made to be broken  
I just want you to know who I am

I just want you to know who I am  
I just want you to know who I am  
I just want you to know who I am  
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i'm planning to do more… just wanted to see how this went. Constructive criticism appreciated. If no one reviews theni probably won't post something like this again... so if you liked it let me know.


	2. midnight conversations

oh wow, i… never believed anyone would want to read this… i was so thrilled to be getting comments! thanks so much everyone! i won't hold you up much longer, but comments mean so much to me. i can't even describe what it feels like. please, please, please comment!  
lol... i just found this song and liked the words though i've never heard it. it's called Feel the Silence by the goo goo dolls (again). figured i might as well stick with them, 'least for a little while.

chapter title:  
**midnight conversations with blue eyes that never cry**  
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Logan sighed. That hadn't gone exactly as he'd planned. He watched her walk away. He was consumed with love for her, but it was plain that following her right now wouldn't do any good. He tried to shrug it off, telling himself that she'd just had a bad day or somethin'.

He picked up his bag and lugged it up to what had been his room. He paused briefly before opening the door. He was fairly sure they hadn't touched it; Charles always saw that it was left alone. Hm, Charles… might have to pay him a visit.

He opened the door and tossed his bag inside. Then he headed down the hall to see Charles.Sure, it was a little late, but he's a telepath, right? He probably already knows I'm here!

He reached up to knock on the door, but as usual, didn't have to. A few minutes later they'd gone through their usual rituals (Xavier offering him a seat, him declining…)

"Logan, you haven't been gone long this time. Is everything alright?"

"Mm…" he mumbled. "Yeah. Everything's fine. Guess I just… missed having cold bear in the fridge."

He smiled. "We left you room alone, but as for the beer, we're slightly lacking in that area at the moment."

"I'll fix that soon enough…" he started for the door.

"It's good to have you back."  
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Logan headed for his room. He was surprised to find that it smelled different. It still had all the same smells… there were just different amounts of them. There was sure a lot more Marie smell than he remembered. And less of him… that's what happens when you go away, he supposed. But the Marie smell confused him, and stirred up so many feelings…

You lie awake at night  
With blue eyes that never cry  
All you remember now  
Is what you feel

Gosh he'd missed her. He'd missed her so much. He loved how simple it was with her. He was himself, and she was herself, no questions asked. They didn't have to talk, but if they wanted to, it was easy, so easy…

Memories flooded back to him, conversations they'd had, that smuglook on her face, the way he could make her so angry...  
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The truth remains  
In midnight conversations  
I asked for this moment  
But you turned away

By the time Rogue reached her room, she was sobbing again. She'd spent hours dreaming about his return, but they had never gone like that. She'd thought he loved her, thought he was coming back for her. She'd thought about him so much… dreamed so many dreams.

Before she might have felt silly and young, but not now. She'd grow up and was a lot stronger than before. Now she was angry, because she had really loved him, and she knew her love was not childish.  
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Sad like a lonely child  
Broken the day you're born  
I held the light to you  
But I was so vain

He couldn't take it any longer. He had heard all the younger partiers returning, and after another hour or 2 of tossing and turning, he'd figured out _exactly_ how useless it was to try to sleep. His mind was weary, but he had to talk to her, had to make her understand. He'd run away before, very scared of his feelings for her, but it hadn't taken long for him to "grow up".

He was standing at her door trying to figure out what to say. Maybe this wasn't a very logical thing to do, but he loved her and he'd made up his mind.  
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And you remain  
A promise unfulfilled  
I ask you for more  
But you push me away  
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He opened the door and walked in. She wasn't asleep.

And if we feel the silence  
Holding this all inside  
Everything means more now than  
Words could explain

"Marie…" He whispered.

And if we feel the silence  
Holding this all inside us  
Looking for something more to say  
I don't know where I'm going  
Only know where I been  
But you move through my soul like a hurricane wind

She looked as if she would cry again. Her eyes showed so much sadness and pain.

We've been so lost for so long  
I don't know how to get back again  
And we're drowning in the water  
That flows under this bridge  
When you're fighting the current  
You forget how to live  
And I wanted to reach you but I don't know where to begin  
And you remain  
A promise unfulfilled until today

He wanted to run to her, take her in his arms, kiss her, make her feel his love, but he didn't.

And if we feel the silence  
Holding this all inside  
Everything means more now than  
Words could explain  
And if we feel the silence  
Leaving this all behind us  
When it's gone what will you say

She looked tired and weary, and then she rolled over so that he could not see the tears that started down her face.

How do we hold on?  
How do we hold on?  
You lie awake at night  
With blue eyes that never cry  
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there will be more as soon as inspiration strikes... :D butwho knows when that will happen! thanks to everyone who is reading! i honestly didn't mean to leave it at a cliff-hanger... it just happend that way! please forgive me! lots of love!


	3. caribbean blue

i just wanna say… thanks for all the reviews i've gotten, they mean so much to me. my friends… we're… i'm… i'm drifting away from them. or they from me, it's hard to tell… only that… it's gone now, our closeness, our friendship. i miss them so much, and yet it seems as if there is nothing i can do. i feel so alone… the one close friend i still have… we'd don't get to talk that much… but i would be lost without him. and you guys, you're helping me to, more than you can know. it might seem pathetici suppose, but that's how it is.  
i dedicate this to all of my reviewers, past and present. thanks for being here when no one else is.  
right now writing this story is holding me together. this chapter is short, but i'm going to post another very soon (today ah hope). this chapter needed to be short.  
maybe i'm writing this because i need to believe that friends and love can exist, even for someone like me.  
the song is Caribbean Blue, by Enya, my favorite musician. if you've never heard of her (as most haven't), she does Celtic/New Age music… with voice blending and it's absolutely amazing.

_She looked tired and weary, and then she rolled over so that he could not see the tears that started down her face…_

Title:  
caribbean blue  
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He looked on in horror as she turned away… turning away from him, from them, from the only thing he'd ever wanted. He found himself stumbling toward her, his eyes wide with fear. Millions of thoughts pounded in his head… perhaps he'd been wrong to come back?

They both gave a start when the floor creaked. From across the room Jubilee rolled over and moaned in her sleep. Logan stopped moving, sadness filling his eyes. His love was over there crying, and there was nothing he could do about it.

so the world goes round and round  
with all you ever knew  
they say the sky, high above  
is Caribbean blue

Marie lay there, thinking. She'd heard him try to come closer. She'd seen the look in his eyes and knew that he had missed her…

if every man says all he can,  
if every man is true,  
do I believe the sky above  
is Caribbean blue?

…missed her, maybe even loved her?

She gained control of herself and stopped crying. She pushed herself to a sitting position and sat for a moment. Somehow she knew that everything would be ok.

if all you told was turned to gold,  
if all you dreamed were new,  
imagine sky high above  
in Caribbean blue

A small smile crept onto her face, and the fire that had been missing from her eyes since his departure suddenly returned. She silently got up from her bed and started walking towards the door.

Logan's face brightened for a moment, but she pushed right past him and began to walk down the hall…  
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more coming soon, i promise.


	4. wish everyone was loved tonight

oh man, i'm sooooooooooooo sorry guys…i totally intended to post another (longer) chapter within an hour! but see, i've been having a huge problem with allergies of late… and… i finally gave in and took some allergy medicine. that stuff always puts me out for 3-4 hours… no matter which onei take, i always end up in bed, sleeping! here is your chapter, i wanted it to be perfect, so i've been thinking about it for awhile. please forgive me!  
the song is Better Days by (guess who!) goo goo dolls.

chapter title:  
wish everyone was loved tonight  
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He followed after her slowly like a sad, lost puppy. He didn't know where she was going, and wasn't quite sure if she wanted him following her. Her smell had changed though, and it gave him a little hope.

Rogue stopped a little ways down the hall. "You comin' Sugar?"

His eyes lit up as he hurried after her. She continued down the hall, down the stairs and into the TV room, where she sat down on the couch.

"We've got a lot to talk about, and unless you want an audience, we'd better do it down here." She explained.

He kneeled in front of her and nodded. He was glad to see her spunk returning.

Rogue took a deep breath and smiled at him. "I missed you." She said soberly. "I wanted you to come back…"

And you ask me what I want this year  
And I try to make this kind and clear  
Just the chance that maybe we'll find better days

He couldn't hold it in anymore, he had to tell her. He just wasn't quite sure how… he wanted to show her that he needed her more than just physically. He had some idea that enveloping her in a kiss wouldn't exactly prove it. "Marie…"

Cuz I don't need boxes wrapped in strings  
And designer love and empty things  
Just the chance that maybe we'll find better days

He bit his lip. She looked on encouragingly, "it's ok Sugar, tell me."

So take these words  
And sing out loud  
Cuz everyone is forgiven now  
Cuz tonight's the night the world begins again

He tried again, but faltered.

"Logan… _please_ tell me. I _need_ you to tell me." She spoke her words slowly, with passion, need and longing.

I need someplace simple where we could live  
And something only you can give  
And that's faith and trust and peace while we're alive

"Marie…" He looked puzzled, trying to find the words. "I… missed you." He turned away, as if ashamed to be saying those words. "I need you." He whispered.

And the one poor child who saved this world  
And there's ten million more who probably could  
If we all just stopped and said a prayer for them

"I need you to." She whispered back.

"I… need you more than just… I need your love to, not just…" he couldn't help looking at her face, every inch of it,and his hand reached outinvoluntarily as the animal part of him tried to take over. She was soooo beautiful... soo... perfect... He felt a growl starting, but abruptly shook his head and pulled his hand back.He needed her to know that he really loved her, and not just physically needed her.

"Sugar, you have all my love, all of me. Not just my sex." She grinned as passion flickered in his eyes. "I belong to you, physically _and_ emotionally."

So take these words  
And sing out loud  
Cuz everyone is forgiven now  
Cuz tonight's the night the world begins again

He breathed easier now that all the needed words were out. Now she understood him and that was what counted. What were a few hard moments if she was his for a lifetime?

I wish everyone was loved tonight  
And somehow stop this endless fight  
Just the chance that maybe we'll find better days

Marie smiled and wrapped her arms around him. He did the same, pulling her close. He smelled her and felt so deeply that now he had all he wanted. It was as a dream, for both of them. The enveloping warmth of love surrounded them and each wanted the moment to last forever.

So take these words  
And sing out loud  
Cuz everyone is forgiven now  
Cuz tonight's the night the world begins again  
Cuz tonight's the night the world begins again  
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well there you go... sorry i didn't get it up right away.  
oh... i've never written... kissing or anything, but i'm going to give it a try. i think they deserve it, don't you? anyways, we'll just have to see how that goes... :) but it's not over yet! (i hope!)


	5. boy in the bubble

ah've got this thing called a job and it required me to stop writing and go do this thing called work. (thus no updates earlier today)  
this chapter was different from the others. up till now i've just been able to just write straight through… but i ended up re-writing parts of this over and over and then finally just started over. (i'm finally sorta happy with it now though!)  
i'm running out of songs, but i love the stability they provide… i'll be taking suggestions for songs and/or poems for future chapters. submit anything you like, even if you're not sure i'll like it. it doesn't even have to seem to fit, who knows where this story will go! (as for this chapter, i got tired of all the talking and wanted just a bit of action…) (ok, maybe more than just a bit…)  
this song is the Boy in the Bubble, by Paul Simon. if you get a chance, listen to it, cause his songs sound the coolest… lots of different instruments and always a cool sound.  
many thanks to all my patient readers and reviewers!  
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chapter title:  
boy in the bubble  
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Their hug lasted until the power suddenly went out. Both were very calm about the matter, neither giving any thought of screaming or panic. It was different, apparently, for the young mutant upstairs.

It was a slow day  
And the sun was beating  
On the soldiers by the side of the road  
There was a bright light  
A shattering of shop windows  
The bomb in the baby carriage  
Was wired to the radio

The scream rang loud and shrill, waking everyone in the mansion up, and, a few moments later, causing yet another girl to shriek.

These are the days of miracle and wonder  
This is the long distance call  
The way the camera follows us in slo-mo  
The way we look to us all  
The way we look to a distant constellation  
That's dying in a corner of the sky  
These are the days of miracle and wonder  
And don't cry baby, don't cry, don't cry

Logan stood up as his claws slid out. "This is either an attack or we blew a fuse… You find out what all the screamin's about, I'm goin' to go check the fuse box."

Rogue nodded, but then realized it was dark and he might not be able to see her. It didn't matter though, he was off before she could say anything.

These are the days of miracle and wonder  
This is the long distance call  
The way the camera follows us in slo-mo  
The way we look to us all  
The way we look to a distant constellation  
That's dying in a corner of the sky  
These are the days of miracle and wonder  
And don't cry baby, don't cry, don't cry

Rogue ran up the stairs, the obvious direction of the scream. When she got there most of the teachers had flashlights and were trying to calm everyone down. There were simply too many people for her to risk getting close, but it wasn't long before Scott started sending people back to their rooms, just to clear the place out.

"Everyone out of the hallway! Everyone go back to your rooms and stay calm until we figure this out!" Scott shouted above the noise.

It was a dry wind  
And it swept across the desert  
And it curled into the circle of birth  
And the dead sand  
Falling on the children  
The mothers and the fathers  
And the automatic earth

_Rogue,_ she could hear professor Xavier calling her. _Rogue, where is Logan?_

"He went to check out the fuse box." She thought back to him.

There was a pause. _Rogue, I want you to get Jean and go find him._

"Is he...?"

_Go now!_

"JEAN!" Marie hollered above the noise. She didn't have to shout again because Jean came rushing toward her.

"Where is he?" asked Jean, obviously informed of the plan.

These are the days of miracle and wonder  
This is the long distance call  
The way the camera follows us in slo-mo  
The way we look to us all  
The way we look to a distant constellation  
That's dying in a corner of the sky  
These are the days of miracle and wonder  
And don't cry baby, don't cry, don't cry

It wasn't just a blown fuse. Logan had known that. But it would bea goodplace to look for the intruder.  
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Rogue and Jean rushed down to the fuse box. It was hidden deep within the mansion, yet perhaps not deep enough.  
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Logan smelled no one. He saw no one. But he could_feel_ someone.

The room was big, and fairly empty. Too empty for anyone to hide.

An invisible attacker. A sent-less, invisible attacker. He'd never fought anyone he couldn't smell before.

It's a turn-around jump shot  
It's everybody jump start  
It's every generation throws a hero up the pop charts  
Medicine is magical and magical is art, think of  
The Boy in the Bubble  
And the baby with the baboon heart

The first blow came, and Logan wasn't the one giving it. It hit him on the back with an incredibly cold blast. He turned quickly, trying to see the attacker.

Nothing.

And I believe  
These are the days of lasers in the jungle  
Lasers in the jungle somewhere  
Staccato signals of constant information  
A loose affiliation of millionaires  
And billionaires and baby

Rogue and Jean reached the room just in time to see Logan fall to the ground.

These are the days of miracle and wonder  
This is the long distance call  
The way the camera follows us in slo-mo  
The way we look to us all  
The way we look to a distant constellation  
That's dying in a corner of the sky  
These are the days of miracle and wonder  
And don't cry baby, don't cry, don't cry  
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you'll have to tell me if this was good or not... cause it sure was different! i hope it's not too confusing, i didn't want to have too many breaks in it because i wanted it to bea bit of a blurr... let me know if you liked it :P


	6. to have

today… oh wow, today… wow… today was one of those days… it all started whenah was innocently reading Rogue/Logan fanfiction… (like a good little girl) when all of a sudden the Wolverine in me decides to take over! like 3 different people told me how quiet ah was being today… and ah was like all roaming around the house and being all Loganish… (scrunches her nose) then ah had work and… ah felt like a caged tiger… and do you have any idea how hard it is to drive even remotely close to speed limit?  
anyways… lol… that was my day. let me just say that Logan mood is NOT very conductive to writing…

thanks to Sesshy's First Love, Teri Neko, and Illusional Façade forthe comments. i also wanted to say a special thanks to LogansLaurie for the last comment. i was going to just go to bed… but i got it and decided to write this and post instead. (aren't i so nice?)  
the song… uh… what is this song? hold on… i've got it… (it's on my sister's CD… lol) mmm… it's Everything, by Lighthouse.  
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chapter title:  
to have…  
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Logan fell to the ground with a thud. He appeared to be unconscious.

"Logan!" Marie started to run toward him…

Find me here  
And speak to me  
I want to feel you  
I need to hear you  
You are the light  
That's leading me to the place  
Where I find peace again

Jean was mentally searching for the attacker that they could not see. What she found astounded her. They were like ice fairies… at least in appearance. They moved slowly, laughing, always laughing. She felt them laughing at her…

Suddenly Jean fell to the floor with a soft groan…

You are the strength  
That keeps me walking  
You are the hope  
That keeps me trusting  
You are the light to my soul  
You are my purpose  
You're everything

Marie turned back toward Jean, torn between the two of them. Strangely enough she was not the slightest bit worried about her own safety, only about her two friends. _Well, one friend and…_ but she couldn't think about that right now.

And how can I stand here with you  
And not be moved by you  
Would you tell me how could it be  
Any better than this

Telling herself that Logan's healing was going to kick in any second now, she rushed over to Jean. It would have looked rather selfish had she let Jean die if she could have saved her.

You calm the storms  
And you give me rest  
You hold me in your hands  
You won't let me fold  
You still my heart  
When you take my breath away  
Would you take me in take me deeper now

Rogue looked at Jean and was relieved to see her breathing.

A moment later, Logan moaned, and Rogue sighed with relief. "It's all going to be ok…"

And how can I stand here with you  
And not be moved by you  
Would you tell me how could it be  
Any better than this

Logan shook his head and then stood up. "Marie! What are…" then he saw Jean. "What happened to her?"

Marie looked helplessly up at him. "We were trying to save you."

And how can I stand here with you  
And not be moved by you  
Would you tell me how could it be  
Any better than this

Logan mumbled something and walked over to Jean.

"She's breathing." Marie said hopefully.

"M-hum." He said, picking her up to carry her to the med room.

Cause you're all I want  
You're all I need  
You're everything.. everything

_Rogue, what happened to Jean? I can't talk to her anymore?_

It was the Professor.

"_Oh, she… whatever it was, it did something to her. I'm not sure what. It was invisible… we're bringing her up right now."_ Rogue answered.  
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As soon as Scott got word of Jean he rushed to meet them. "Jean!"

Logan gladly handed her over. "Here ya go…"

Scott looked a bit surprised, but gladly took her and hurried on ahead, leaving Rogue and Logan behind.  
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The attack seemed to have stopped, the only casualties had been Jean and Logan, but Logan of course was fine by now.

_Rogue, I can handle things from here. Jean was communicating with me when it happened and I believe she will be alright soon. Get some rest if you can…_

"Logan…" Marie chewed her lip, obviously thinking about something.

"Mm?"

"If I were to just sorta randomly fall over like Jean, would you pick me up and carry me back to your room?"

"Might." He looked into her big eyes and came the closest to a smile she'd ever seen.

And how can I stand here with you  
And not be moved by you  
Would you tell me how could it be  
Any better any better than this  
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Might be a little abrupt… but I gotta get some sleep… all I can think about is bed!


	7. and to hold?

Hi (grins) it's late and yeah…  
This song is called Inner Universe and it's by Ghost in the Shell. It's (yawn) been translated so… (yawn) yeah… you'd have to hear it cause the words just don't do it justice, it's a beautiful song.  
Sorry I didn't update for so long. My best firend and I got in a huge fight thing… and that really killed me so yeah… I guess it's better now… sorta… maybe… not really at all but we're back to ignoring it so supposedly it's better. I just wish she'd quit toying with me cause it hurts thinking that I'm going to lose her when she's really not that mad.  
Anyways, sorry, didn't mean to just… spill everyting, it just sorta came out.  
Review if you want more story… lol i sure do need the encouragement now.  
oh and the chapter title may not seem to fit, but i just wanted to continue with the thought about losing someone you love... (maybe you'd have to be in my head to understand?)

"_If I were to just sorta randomly fall over, would you pick me up and carry me back to your room?"_

"_Might."  
__  
_chap title:  
…and to hold?  
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Logan didn't wait for Marie to "randomly" fall over. He picked her up and held her close, happily breathing his favorite smell: Marie.

She clung to him, resting her head on his chest. It wasn't long before she was asleep.

They were both long past the point of "tired" and were much closer to "delusional". It was all Logan could do to get them back to his room.  
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Angels and demons were circling above me  
Breaking the hardships and starry ways  
The only one who doesn't know happiness  
Is the one who couldn't understand its call

The Professor and Scott hovered over Jean. She hadn't regained consciousness yet, and they were both a little worried.

Scott held her hand, hardly daring to breath out of worry.  
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Logan walked into his room and set her down gently on his bed.

There was still more than a little turmoil going on outside, but Marie was already asleep and as tired as he was, it wasn't going to take Logan long to follow. The professor had assured them that there was nothing more they could do. Neither of them had slept well for months, and both were worn out physically as well as emotionally.

He pulled the covers over her gently, and couldn't help but stare at the peaceful expression on her face.  
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I am Calling  
Calling now  
Spirits rise and falling  
To stay myself longer...  
Calling, Calling, in the depth of longing  
To stay myself longer...

The Professor was a little calmer than Scott. His eyes were closed, and he was reaching with his mind trying to find her.

Most of the teachers were standing outside the med room, leaving the capable younger generation to fix the power outage.  
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Stand alone... Where was life when it had a meaning...  
Stand alone... Nothing's real anymore and...  
...Endless run...  
While I'm alive, I can try not to fall while flying,  
Not to forget how to dream... how to love  
...Endless run...

Logan lay down on the other side of the bed, close enough to know she was there, but far enough away that they wouldn't touch. Someone it just didn't feel right to get too close… they'd been through enough in the past few months, not to mention everything that had happened that night…  
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Calling, Calling, For the place of knowing  
There's more than what can be linked  
Calling, Calling, Never will I look away  
For what life has left for me  
Yearning, Yearning, for what's left of loving

Jean felt the Professor in her head. She was happy that he was there. He was calling to her, asking her to come back. And she felt Scott's hand, holding hers, begging her to come back. His hand was shaking.

To stay myself longer...  
Calling, Calling now, Spirits rise and falling  
To stay myself longer...  
Calling, Calling, in the depth of longing  
To stay myself longer...  
She couldn't quite understand what was going on, but after another few minutes she slowly opened her eyes.

Scott jumped up, barely containing a shriek. Carefully he enveloped her in a hug, and she couldn't help but notice a few tears start down his face.  
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When Marie woke it was early afternoon. She yawned and gave a little stretch. She'd spent more than half of her nights in Logan's room while he was gone, so it was nothing new to wake up in his room.

What was slightly surprising was that Logan was laying next to her, staring at her.

"Hey Marie." He said calmly.

"OH!" she said, surprised. Slowly the events of last night dawned upon her, and she gave a small smile. "Oh, ah… forgot."

He smiled to, lost in her brown eyes.

"Logan?"

"Mm?"

"What happened last night? The last thing I remember is…you and then...Jean! Is she alright?"

"I don't know kid. All I know is that we needed sleep. So I got us here, and… we both slept."

"We gotta find out!" she said, jumping out of bed. "It was an attack last night." She meant it as a question, but it came out sounding like a statement.

"Hey, wait."

"What?"

"You're ok? I mean, really ok?"

Marie smiled. "Yes, ah'm ok. How 'bought you Sugar? Thought ah'd lost you for a second."

Logan grinned. "Naw, I'm thick headed."

"Ah know Sugar."  
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(needs sleep) ah think i'm past "tired" and i'm beginning to get closer to that delusional state… forgive me, please,if this isn't the greatest chapter.


	8. what was it?

Is it (cough) normal to communicate more in grunts and facial expressions than in words? Oh well, who's normal anyways?  
I know I haven't posted a chapter in forever… please forgive me. I've had tons and tons of homework (I'm taking an online class over the summer) I tried several times to write, but I just can't seem to get in the mood…  
Oh, and I'm breaking tradition… no song for this one and it's fairly short… sorry! Gotta try to grab all the loose ends I've created and… make them into something semi-coherent.

chapter title:  
what was it?  
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Jean was still a bit weak from the encounter, but she was back on her feet, much to everyone's relief.

The attack had been brief, only Jean, Logan and Rogue had come in contact with the ice fairies, making it little more than a power outage for most of the students.

The professor set a meeting for 3:00, but requested to see Logan and Rogue before then.  
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Rogue reached up to knock on the door, but the professor invited them in before she could. "Always does that…" she mused.

They walked in and both sat down on the couch.

"How are you both feeling?" asked the Professor.

Rogue glanced at Logan and then smiled. "Better than we've felt in months. How is Jean? She looked alright, is she really ok?"

"Good, I'm glad you're feeling better." There seemed to be no way to rush the Professor. "I believe Jean will be fine, if given a bit of time to recover her strength."

"And what about the attack?" asked Logan. He actually looked almost comfortable sitting on the couch next to Rogue.

"That's part of why I called you here. Rogue, you mentioned that the enemy was invisible, is that correct?"

Rogue nodded. "Jean and ah didn't see anyone when we came in. Ah couldn't see its attacks either, just Logan gettin' hurt."

"And you Logan? Anything else?"

"I couldn't see it and I couldn't smell it. Couldn't hear much of anything, 'cept a soft murmur that sounded sorta like laughter."

"Interesting…"

"It was cold, to, when it hit me. Felt like it was raining ice." Said Logan.

"Well we will definitely have our hands full trying to figure this out. I'm sure you've already been informed, but I've scheduled a meeting for 3:00. Since you are two of the three people that had any contact with whatever it was that caused the attack, it would be most helpful if you would attend."  
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(flashback: the night before)

Kitty stumbled out of bed. She knew she shouldn't have had 3 glasses of water at dinner…

She was in the middle of washing her hands when the power went off. Involuntarily, she screamed.

The next few seconds felt like the world had tipped over and was trying to right itself. Doors flew open, people rushed into the halls. Light switches were flipped and re-flipped, the power outage now making itself known.

Jubilee bumped her head searching for a flashlight._ Ooph. Now who would be stupid enough to put a wall right there?_

Finally she found the flashlight and it was then that she discovered that Rogue was gone! That was the second scream. She darted out into the hallway, which was now crammed with people. "Scott!" she yelled "Where's Rogue?"

Scott heard her over the noise and gave her a look of complete bewilderment. "How am I supposed to know where anyone is in the middle of all this?"

Jubilee thought for a moment. _Good point._ Then she shrugged. "Well I can't find her!"

Scott hadn't heard her, he was busy with other things.

(end flashback)  
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"Rogue! Where have you _been_ girl?" Logan had resisted the urge to hide Rogue and himself when he saw Kitty and Jubilee coming. "Oh, hi Wolvie! Guess that explains where you've been!" she giggled.

Rogue looked at Logan "Ah'm going to get a shower, ah'll see you in a bit ok?"

Logan looked first at Jubilee, then at Kitty, and finally at Rogue.

"Ah'll be out in 45 minutes, tops. Could you maybe get me some food? Please?"

Logan grunted, but it sounded like an "ok" grunt to Rogue.

"Thanks Sugar."  
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Rogue spent the next 45 minutes trying to convince Jubilee and Kitty that there _were_ no juicy details yet.

Logan wandered down to the kitchen, hoping to find it deserted.

It wasn't.


End file.
